Archive for July 2007




It’s always been about everyone else…

Friday, June 29, 2007

All my life, it’s always been about other people.

What makes THEM happy. What makes THEM comfortable. What THEY want out of life . What THEY want in a relationship.

So, I’d like to, for once… talk about me.

So let’s see…

I’d like to be right for once. That’d be nice. I’m usually right about stuff, but people will argue with me until their face turns blue. But, come on, when you know something and you feel it in your gut… you’re most likely right.

I’d like to love and live for someone, and I want someone to love and live for me. I want to be the most important part of someone’s life, and I want them to make me happy. I will do the same for them.

I give my all; it’d be nice to know someone would give their all to me.

It’d be nice to have someone make plans with me, for me… Around me, my schedule when it permits. Not all the time, just every once in a while. I’m usually the one who has to schedule myself around others.

I want someone to surprise me with something. I like surprises. I like sweet surprises. I want to get a phone call from someone just to say they love me. I want them to understand my needs and fulfill them as much as possible, just as I will do for them.

I want to be the only girl that truly matters to them. I want my feelings and opinions to matter and be heard, and not just be white noise.

I want to cry from joy on my wedding day. I want that day to be… just amazing.
I want to cry and feel beautiful… I want to have a family… I want to wake up every morning and, even when stressed, feel like… feel like this is where I am supposed to be.

I want to wake up in his arms and fall asleep in his arms every night. I want to be missed when I’m gone. I want to be able to know that no one will ever deceive or hurt me… I want someone to help mend my heart, and not break it.

I want to be treated and respected like the lady that I am.

I don’t believe I ask for too much. I really don’t. Why’s it so… unreasonable for me to ask for something? Why is it that everyone else can ask from me, but I can’t ask from anyone else?

Sometimes I truly believe that life is just not fair…

Add comment July 17, 2007

It was a big mistake…

 Saturday, June 23, 2007

It was a big mistake…

To think that I could ever trust you with my finances.  Now not only have you left me with nothing, you’ve left me with debt that I will have to pay with my next paycheck.  And to top it off, you tell me that I’m a horrible person for wanting you to pay me back?  Open your eyes.  Once I leave your life, your life will be the same, and do you know why?  Because I’m not the problem.  And guess what?  You’re going to always be broke, and do you know why?  Because I’m not the problem. Thank you for leaving me with nothing for the next two weeks.  Oh, and next time you ask me for help, even if it’s five dollars, think twice, because guess what – I’m not giving you shit.  And don’t worry -  I’ll be out of your life forever sooner than you think.  I’m not going to let you keep poisoning my life the way you do.  Good luck finding someone who will let you fuck them up financially the way you’ve fucked me up.  You don’t think it’s sad that you’re in your 40s and can’t even pay your rent?  Look at yourself before you criticize others.  Ask everyone – ask them how I’ve ruined their life, and then ask them how YOU’VE ruined their life.  I’m sure the answers will surprise only you.

Add comment July 17, 2007

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